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Article: The Journey of Conscious Aging: Insights from a Psychotherapist

By June 11, 2025July 14th, 2025Echoes of the Work Articles

Article Written by Martina Breen for the Centre of Conscious Eldering Newsletter. May 2025

Ireland, like many other developed countries, is experiencing an ageing population, with people living longer than ever before. The Central Statistics Office (CSO) figures predict that those aged 65 years and over will increase significantly: from 629,800 in 2016 to almost 1.6 million by 2051.[1] This evolving ageing population presents new challenges and opportunities for not just us as a nation; the same pattern is occurring worldwide.

Reb Zalman, Autor of Age-ing to Sage-ing (1995)[2] poses the question of why should we live beyond than the time of begetting and raising our children?  He goes on to state: “ If we do live longer, then nature must have a task.  There must be a purpose.  The purpose is to hothouse consciousness, generation by generation; so that the older generation can transmit something to the younger.”[3]  Rather than allowing yourself to just grow old – you can make a decision to enter a new life stage and consciously age.  So, whilst ageing is a natural process that involves physical changes and a gradual decline in physical abilities. Eldering or Sage-ing, on the other hand, is an intentional approach to aging that involves actively seeking out opportunities for growth and transformation in the second half of life. It’s about getting older with intentionality, resilience, and grace. It involves not only addressing the physical and mental aspects of aging, but also the spiritual aspects such as finding meaning and purpose in the lives we have lived, as well as exploring and visioning the time we have left.  Rather than viewing ageing as a period of decline and loss, it is time to look at our process of ageing as a time of growth, wisdom, and personal transformation.

These approaches to healthy aging align with the wisdom shared in Ron’s book: (2014) “Conscious living, Conscious Aging”[4] along with books like “Tuesdays with Morrie”[5] by Mitch Albom.   They each offer us profound lessons about the value of inner growth, personal transformation, and the importance of having a sense of community as we grow into our elder years.  To become an adult, we need to let go of being an adolescent. To become an elder, we need to have completed our adulting. Elderhood is a new phase of life, given to us by the grace of longevity. There is a newfound freedom in embracing our age and ageing consciously. By modelling conscious aging and embodying its principles in our own lives, we can inspire the people in our lives to do the same and create a more compassionate and fulfilling world for ourselves and others.

Ron offers us a guidebook in exploring the aging process with awareness, curiosity, and purpose.  He writes extensively around the personal and spiritual growth that occurs as we age and he models his own teaching in his own personal life.  He says that this growth that’s available to us as we age  is not necessarily a given; it requires a deliberate effort to engage with our own aging process and to cultivate qualities like self-awareness, resilience, and wisdom.

As one ages, like all of us do, we find our way through life.

If we didn’t age, we would remain stagnant and bettering ourselves or helping others would not be second nature.

Tuesdays with Morrie

According to Pevny, conscious eldering involves several key practices. One is self-reflection, which involves taking time to reflect on our life experiences, our values, and our goals for the future. Another is community-building, which involves connecting with others who share our interests and values, and who can support us on our journey of conscious aging. A third practice is service, which involves using our skills and experience to make a positive impact in our communities and the world at large.

I experienced these teachings first hand by attending Ron’s Conscious Eldering Retreat in Ghost Ranch in May of this year.  Ron and co-facilitator Barbara skilfully created a safe holding space for 13 elder questors.  We met on Saturday afternoon in the high desert ranch in New Mexico and with a deepening process of exploring, reflecting and sharing; we created a community that was the lived experience of conscious eldering.  When we connect with others and share our interests and our values, when we have community time and sole time, when we have ample time in nature to learn from Mother Earth, and when we connect through ritual and ceremony; we create a rich fertile ground that we meet the deeper parts of ourselves and when we are connected to ourselves, we naturally look to see how we can serve others.

We can say that the need for wise elderhood in our current world of crisis cannot be overstated. In modern society, the value of elders has been diminished, and their voices.  It’s suffice to say that most of us are aware that aging can come with emotional challenges such as grief, anxiety, or depression, along with significant life transitions such as retirement, changes in health, loss of sense of meaning and purpose in life, or loss of loved ones. Not all people ageing suffer with these, but many do.  We need to be reminded that the elders of any community possess a unique set of skills, knowledge, and wisdom that can guide us towards a better future.

The cultural narrative often focuses on youth, and the value of experience and wisdom is overlooked and many older adults have negative beliefs about aging, such as feeling that they are less valued or less capable as they get older.

However, the elders are the ones who have lived through the ups and downs of life, accumulated a wealth of knowledge, and gained invaluable insights that can guide society through these challenging times. They possess a level of wisdom that can only be acquired through years of life experience, and it is this wisdom that is needed in lives of our young people today.

I do believe that the United States has progressed in this area.   Here in western Europe, it is time for us to acknowledge, not only, the value of the elders, but to endeavour to become one ourselves. As a psychotherapist, I’m acutely aware that it’s important that I become a conscious elder myself, in order to better support conscious aging in my clients.

“An Elder is a person who is still growing, still a learner, still with potential, and whose life continues to have within it promise for, and connection to the future.”

Age-ing to Sage-ing

We helpers, are in a unique position to model conscious aging for our clients by embodying the principles of conscious aging in our own lives and to continue to grow and develop, not just as professionals, but as ageing human beings in a world where ageing and elderhood as a stage of life, is often ignored and under-appreciated.  Only when we value ourselves as elders, will we truly harness the power of wisdom to create a more just, equitable, and sustainable world for all.

References

[1] https://www.cso.ie/en/releasesandpublications/ep/p-plfp/populationandlabourforceprojections2017-2051/populationprojectionsresults/
[2] Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi. Miller, Ronald S. “From Age-Ing to Sage-Ing: A Profound New Vision of Growing Older” (1995) Warner Books NY.
[3] Abid.
[4] Currently in reprint
[5] Albom. Mitch, “Tuesdays with Morrie”, Chicago. 2017.

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